In case my last several Tips sound as if I’m prompting solo moms to deceive their clients into believing they are something that they’re not, let me explain. What I’m really trying to do is prevent solo moms from thinking that they are something other than what they actually are – competent, highly trained professionals, who happen to have children.
We read time after time that women aren’t as good as men when it comes to negotiating salaries; asking for raises; promoting themselves in general. And in my opinion, moms (in general) are even worse at this than other women. And it’s easy to see why – who feels professional and competent when she is sleep deprived and covered in slobber, spit-up, mashed peas – - or worse? (I’ll never forget those freshly dry-cleaned pants that were immediately peed upon.)
Sure, taking phone calls from the Ant Hill (see Tip #5), having erratic office hours (see Tip #6), or passing on a client meeting because your baby sitter isn’t available that day (See Tip #7) may feel unprofessional. Still, these circumstances alone do not make a mother-lawyer or her work-product unprofessional. The tips on how to handle clients in these types of situations are simply reminders to project the smart and competent professional that still exists under the layers of food detritus, spilled paint, uncombed hair and wrinkled clothes.
Now, there is a fine line between projecting competence and professionalism, and leading a client to believe that you are something more than a solo-practitioner. Making promises to do work for a client that will actually require the assistance of several paralegals working full-time for a month, when you only have yourself and 20 free hours per week is not a good idea. Calling your firm “Mother-Lawyer & Associates” when you’re not bringing in enough money to pay for office space, much less a human associate is probably misleading (I think there may even be an Ethics Board decision on that one). Still, never believe that just because you are a sole practitioner, and just because you have children means that you can’t net big clients or that you can’t take on interesting, challenging work. Because it’s just not true.
In fact, some things I perceived as negative were actually embraced by potential clients. Without an associate, paralegal or support staff, I couldn’t compete against a partner at a big law firm for business, right? Wrong! Some companies like knowing that the person they talk to on the phone – you – is the same person who is doing the actual work on the case. They like the fact that you answer your own phone. They like the fact that you are flexible (often by necessity) and can meet on evenings or weekends. One client was amazed that I met with him for a free consultation in his own office. I’m convinced that it was a major factor in winning the account. (What he didn’t know was that I wasn’t fully moved into my office, and that I didn’t want him to see the mess or the pack-’n'-play in the corner!)
So, I guess what I’m really trying to say is trust yourself, be a zealous advocate on your own behalf, and don’t trick yourself into believing that you’re just a little lawyer mom who can’t provide the services clients need.
